Self-sabotage isn’t just a bad habit—it’s the quiet thief of your potential. This article calls it out, strips away the excuses, and shows you how to break the patterns keeping you from the life you’re meant to live.

Are you stuck in a pattern—a rut—because it’s familiar, even though you secretly want more?

Do you feel the pull to make a change, but the very thought of it leaves you uncomfortable… maybe even scared?

Welcome to the world of self-sabotage.

And before you get defensive—yes, every one of us does it. Even when we swear we don’t.

Here’s a personal story.

When I created my Dragonfly Journey Oracle Deck, I focused on words that capture life’s journey—Discovery, Balance, Self-Love, Purpose. But I also knew life isn’t all sunshine and affirmations. It comes with Struggle, Loss, Obstacles, Betrayal.

I wanted the deck to be both supportive and nurturing—like a trusted friend—but also thought-provoking. I’m naturally wired to provoke growth, to raise consciousness, to tell the truth (even when it’s uncomfortable).

After using it daily for months, I’ve come to see the deck’s personality: warm and encouraging, but also blunt and unflinching. It calls you on your s*it.

Every morning, I ask my Higher Power: What’s the highest choice I could make today?

Lately, one card keeps showing up: #46 Self-Sabotage.

The first time, I was shocked. “That’s not me,” I told myself. I even got a little mad at the message.

But that day, I looked at it differently.

What does self-sabotage really mean?

It’s often invisible—disguised as hesitation, procrastination, or self-doubt. It keeps you locked in familiar cycles because breaking free feels risky.

Why do we do it?

Because those patterns are rooted in deep conditioning—stories that tell us we’re unworthy, incapable, or unsafe to receive what we truly want. And without realizing it, we push away love, success, opportunities… because they threaten our comfort zone.

Your life is built on patterns—habits in both behavior and belief. Breaking them requires:

• Self-awareness to recognize them

• Courage to sit in discomfort

• Willingness to rewrite your script

Staying in your comfort zone isn’t safety—it’s stagnation. And that, my friend, is self-sabotage.

So I asked myself: Where am I doing this?

My answer came through journaling and meditation. It’s my weight-loss journey. For the past 5–6 months, I’ve been stuck.

My inner narrative sounded like this:

• “I’m tired of trying” (giving up).

• “It’s coming off too slow” (rationalizing).

• “I’ll just maintain where I’m at” (resignation).

• “Do I even want this, or is it what I’m ‘supposed’ to want?” (external pressure).

• “It’s genetics. I hate cooking. It’s just easier this way” (comfort zone excuses).

Sound familiar?

So I made a decision: This isn’t about a number on a scale (I need to break the habit of getting on the scale every day, BTW). It’s about health and vitality—maintaining strength, mobility, and flexibility as I age. I can control what I eat, how I move, and how I care for myself (my Gate 27 in Human Design).

And from my other frequent card, #49 Surrender, I took the lesson to let go of what I can’t control and commit fully to what I can. (Check out my last blog for my surrender story.)

Now I’ll ask you: Where is self-sabotage showing up in your life?

Are you ready to see it clearly, and do the uncomfortable work to break it?

Through Human Design, I can help you identify the exact patterns and habits keeping you in your “Not-Self” state—the shadow side that blocks your alignment. Returning to the perfection of your design is where true growth begins.

The choice is yours: Stay stuck… or step into the most authentic version of you.